My father was gone.

It seems like all stories start with fathers who left, or fathers who remained but were absent. Mine isn’t about my father, it’s about my mother…which could as well be a story about my father.

I only have one or two clear but shady memories of my father.

His jokes, that only Him and I would understand. And his advice on men.

Talking of men,

I got into marriage very clear that I’m not my mother or grandmother. I was not the one or the two.

My father…well…well…well. Women loved my father and sometimes, he loved them back.

Talking of love,

I liked the idea of a boyfriend who played rugby. It was the shorts. It was those small shorts that showed their muscular physique. Don’t judge me, I was only 20.

With my rugby man….We lived together. We bonded. We were inseparable.

‘You can’t get married right now! You ought to take your time. But not to this man!’ He rebuked.

I couldn’t understand how he decided he had the right to tell me what type of man to marry given his track record. I’m not judging. I love my father. He was my world. I’m a daddy’s girl.

Keep in mind that in my parent’s prime….

I had made my mother a victim in her marriage. And in that victimhood, My father was the villain.

So I decided to marry someone who is the complete opposite of my father.

Newsflash, We got married.

But from the beginning of that marriage, it was a protest ground, Maandamano, Not the throwing stones type. Not the “Wamepandisha bei ya Ovacado”

I was not going to be my grandmother who loved unconditionally, nor was I going to be my mother who endured torture.

But I was Me. Me who is a combination of my grandmother, my mother and definitely my father who had multiple partners.

I had messed up. (Stay tuned, folks)

But my father was not even in this world for me to go back and say, “Daddy it didn’t work out, what do I do?”

Am I cooking or I am cooked? Stay tuned, folks.

Work Inspired by:

Felgonah Oyuga (Author | Storyteller) and Jackson Biko (Author | Publisher)

Comments (4)

• Dan✌️✌️

  November 26, 2025

  Just amazing 👏 😍

  ❤️1(1)

  👍 React

• Lokumu

  November 26, 2025

  Got me thinking of my Dad....

  ❤️1(1)

  👍 React

• Main Admirer

  November 26, 2025

  Has exploring your father's absense given you a better understanding of yourself?🤔 .... especially that ur a combination of 3 personalities? 🤔

  ❤️1(1)

  👍 React

• Andy

  November 26, 2025

  You’re indeed cooking🔥🔥

  👍1❤️1(2)

  👍 React